Lovely Ladies,
I haven't checked in with you in a while, because the relationship with MOH is all consuming. Let's see...where did I leave off. Oh, I remember now, we had a fun double date with a publicist and his girlfriend. So, after that we had a wonderful Saturday. He slept over the night before, and drove me to work. He came into the office and met all my co-workers. And, they all made fun of him because he they 'say' he was wearing Von Dutch. Whatever, I don't believe he would wear Von Dutch. For those who don't yet, Von Dutch is so White Trash. MOH's style is rocker, not preppy, like the guys I work with. So, MOH picks me up at work and he gives me his left over Chinese, so cute. Then, we crash the Smashing Pumpkins concert. He is all over me at the concert and it's adorable. After that, we grab a bite of Mexican food.
So the Mexican lady with the roses, comes over to our table and lays two roses in front me. I am waiting for MOH to give her money and he does nothing. I say, "Aren't you going to tip her?" And he says nothing. We leave the restaurant and I am singing in the car, feeling that everything was fine. I didn't want to come into his apartment because I would have sex and get home too late. Saturday is my busiest day, so for me, Fridays are a school night. All of the sudden, he storms out of the car and barely says goodbye. Instead of being a woman of class and dignity and driving home to get my beauty sleep, I go park my car. Then, I go to his door and call him to get buzzed in...no answer. Then, I call his cell...no answer. Then, I send him 10 text messages, and he doesn't respond. I didn't cuss him out on his voice mail or send nasty texts, though believe you me, I wanted to. Instead, I called my BFF and drove back to the West Side.
The next morning, I stalked him at Agape. I sat in our regular section and sure enough he shows up and says he turned his phone off and went to bed. He said that if we would have communicated, he would have said something mean that could have ended the relationship. Gals, the way some men deal with uncomfortable feelings is to shut down emotionally, go to their cave, lick their wounds and process their feelings. The key is to not take it personally. This type of behavior is particularly tough for me because it triggers my abandonment issues. Remember, the more space we give men, the more they want to be around us. The more we push, the more they flee. So, it's like fishing. You can't swim into the pond holding the bait and go, "Here, little fishie, fishie!" Instead, you sit on the boat with some tunes cranking and bask in the sun, while letting the fish swim toward the bait. When they get close to the boat, then you gently pull the bait away, you keep doing that and voila, they are on the boat!!
Girls, do not put your life on hold while the fish is swimming away. Sometimes, you have to let them free spool. That means, you know that the fish has already hooked himself on the bait. But the fish doesn't want to be captured and he starts swimming away from the boat. That is why you must give men a lot of line, because they don't want to feel pressured in any way. So what happens to the fish, is he swims so fast and furiously away from the boat, that he tires himself out. Then, it's easy to reel him right in. So while you are free spooling your man, go out and have fun. Go on dates with other guys, be prosperous, work out and continue on your own path of personal growth. If he's meant to be your guy, he will come back to the boat. Even MOH, said don't worry, "Goddess Girl, if I get upset I might go away for a day, but I will always return."
Only time will tell...But in the meantime, take care of yourselves. Peace and love.
Smiles,
Goddess Girl
Saturday, September 11, 2010
Saturday, August 21, 2010
HOW TO COURT
Hi Ladies,
Nice to be back here with you all. Believe it or not MOH and I have reconciled for the moment. But don't hold your breath because this relationship is passionate and very volatile. So where I left off with MOH was that Monday night of last week, I still hadn't heard from him. On Tuesday, I wrote on my status, "To err is human, but to forgive is divine."
And he commented, "Then I am divine." I didn't respond to that because my therapist was vehemently against the relationship. So much for objectivity! Then, on Tuesday afternoon, he called my business line with a referral. I still didn't respond. Then he put on his Face Book status some quote by Gandhi, "First they ignore you..." Of course, I thought it was referring to me and I felt guilty for ignoring him. So I called him on Wednesday morning at 10 am and thanked him for the referral and said he was "welcome to call." That's right, girls, don't tell a guy to "call you back" because that is telling them what to do. So by 2 pm in the afternoon, he still hadn't returned my call. It had been a whole week since we had last spoken and I was going through oxytocin withdrawal hell. When I saw him on Face Book instant message, I couldn't resist. I im'd, "hi".
I got completely needy and I asked, "Did you get my message this morning?" OMG! No response. I know men love to be thanked so again I thanked him for the referral. He responded that he was on the phone. I again asked for a convenient time to talk for just "five minutes". He said to call him and, of course, I did. I basically let him have it for emotionally abandoning me and not letting me defend myself. He was very quiet and when I asked why he said, because he didn't want to exacerbate the fight. So at the end of the conversation, which had gone way past five minutes, by the way, I asked him if we were broken up.
And he back pedaled, "Well, how can we break up if weren't really together? I mean let's not put a label on it because it's too much pressure."
I agreed, "You are right. We aren't boyfriend and girlfriend, because I can date whoever I want and you can date whoever you want. But we did agree to be sexually monogamous and to see each other once a week. Is that agreement broken?" Again, total silence. So I got into my yang mode and I came up with a solution, "Why don't we just see each other one more time and either have the human dignity to break up in person or we can try to work it out." He agreed and asked me to call him after work. So I called him at 9 pm as I was leaving the office and he said to call him back at 10 pm because he was in a business meeting. Then, I call him back at 10 pm and he said to call him back at 10:30 pm. So I call him back at 10:30 pm, and I am a little put off to say the least. He then, invites me to come over to his house in Hollywood.
Now ladies, as good as the sex is and as much as I want to make up, I am a little too dignified to traipse across town at 11 pm, so I say, "You sound really busy. Let's just do it another time."
He gets really frustrated and asks when I have to be at work. I tell him whenever I want and he gets even more irritated. So again, I turn into the pleaser, which is the nature of women, and I say, "Do you really want me to come over tonight?" And he says "no" and hangs up on me. Then, I don't hear from him for three more days. I go to Agape Sunday to the early service hoping to bump into him and the later service. I stay for the second service past the meditation and all the way into the second song, still no MOH. So I figure it's not God's will for me to see him and sure enough, as I give up and leave the building, he is walking in. We immediately get all googly eyed and he asks me to sit down with him on a bench outside the church. We talk it through and he invites me out that night. That was the past Sunday and I have seen him, in addition, Monday night, Wednesday night and Friday night. That is four times in one week. We have great sex and he is testing me at every turn to see if I am psycho.
The tough part is that even though we really bond and have great sex, he doesn't call me between visits. I mean, not at all. I am really not used to this behavior. Usually, when someone is my boyfriend, they call every day we make advanced plans. The days he hadn't called this week were beyond torture. But I gave in and called him Wednesday night and when I saw him, he was a grump. Then, when I white knuckled it through two days and didn't call him, he finally called me Friday evening and we went on our first double date. He was full of charm and compliments. He even spoke of the future and showed jealousy of other men. Wow. This hard to get stuff could actually work if I only had the stregnth to do it.
So today is Saturday and I haven't heard from him and it's really tough. But I will probably see him tomorrow at Agape and we will see if we hang out tomorrow after Church. This is truly a battle for the skirt. He has never had to pursue, court or cherish a woman's feelings. And it is becoming painfully obvious he doesn't know how to. The only way to train a man is lack of contact, according to the Bitch Book. And men fall in love when they are away, says Pat Allen. So I am one hour and sometimes one minute at a time staying away. Ladies, we have the power and we are the prize! Any man who thinks that he is the prize is a feminine man or a narcissist and you can do better.
Until we meet again, lovelies!
Sweet dreams,
Goddess Girl
Nice to be back here with you all. Believe it or not MOH and I have reconciled for the moment. But don't hold your breath because this relationship is passionate and very volatile. So where I left off with MOH was that Monday night of last week, I still hadn't heard from him. On Tuesday, I wrote on my status, "To err is human, but to forgive is divine."
And he commented, "Then I am divine." I didn't respond to that because my therapist was vehemently against the relationship. So much for objectivity! Then, on Tuesday afternoon, he called my business line with a referral. I still didn't respond. Then he put on his Face Book status some quote by Gandhi, "First they ignore you..." Of course, I thought it was referring to me and I felt guilty for ignoring him. So I called him on Wednesday morning at 10 am and thanked him for the referral and said he was "welcome to call." That's right, girls, don't tell a guy to "call you back" because that is telling them what to do. So by 2 pm in the afternoon, he still hadn't returned my call. It had been a whole week since we had last spoken and I was going through oxytocin withdrawal hell. When I saw him on Face Book instant message, I couldn't resist. I im'd, "hi".
I got completely needy and I asked, "Did you get my message this morning?" OMG! No response. I know men love to be thanked so again I thanked him for the referral. He responded that he was on the phone. I again asked for a convenient time to talk for just "five minutes". He said to call him and, of course, I did. I basically let him have it for emotionally abandoning me and not letting me defend myself. He was very quiet and when I asked why he said, because he didn't want to exacerbate the fight. So at the end of the conversation, which had gone way past five minutes, by the way, I asked him if we were broken up.
And he back pedaled, "Well, how can we break up if weren't really together? I mean let's not put a label on it because it's too much pressure."
I agreed, "You are right. We aren't boyfriend and girlfriend, because I can date whoever I want and you can date whoever you want. But we did agree to be sexually monogamous and to see each other once a week. Is that agreement broken?" Again, total silence. So I got into my yang mode and I came up with a solution, "Why don't we just see each other one more time and either have the human dignity to break up in person or we can try to work it out." He agreed and asked me to call him after work. So I called him at 9 pm as I was leaving the office and he said to call him back at 10 pm because he was in a business meeting. Then, I call him back at 10 pm and he said to call him back at 10:30 pm. So I call him back at 10:30 pm, and I am a little put off to say the least. He then, invites me to come over to his house in Hollywood.
Now ladies, as good as the sex is and as much as I want to make up, I am a little too dignified to traipse across town at 11 pm, so I say, "You sound really busy. Let's just do it another time."
He gets really frustrated and asks when I have to be at work. I tell him whenever I want and he gets even more irritated. So again, I turn into the pleaser, which is the nature of women, and I say, "Do you really want me to come over tonight?" And he says "no" and hangs up on me. Then, I don't hear from him for three more days. I go to Agape Sunday to the early service hoping to bump into him and the later service. I stay for the second service past the meditation and all the way into the second song, still no MOH. So I figure it's not God's will for me to see him and sure enough, as I give up and leave the building, he is walking in. We immediately get all googly eyed and he asks me to sit down with him on a bench outside the church. We talk it through and he invites me out that night. That was the past Sunday and I have seen him, in addition, Monday night, Wednesday night and Friday night. That is four times in one week. We have great sex and he is testing me at every turn to see if I am psycho.
The tough part is that even though we really bond and have great sex, he doesn't call me between visits. I mean, not at all. I am really not used to this behavior. Usually, when someone is my boyfriend, they call every day we make advanced plans. The days he hadn't called this week were beyond torture. But I gave in and called him Wednesday night and when I saw him, he was a grump. Then, when I white knuckled it through two days and didn't call him, he finally called me Friday evening and we went on our first double date. He was full of charm and compliments. He even spoke of the future and showed jealousy of other men. Wow. This hard to get stuff could actually work if I only had the stregnth to do it.
So today is Saturday and I haven't heard from him and it's really tough. But I will probably see him tomorrow at Agape and we will see if we hang out tomorrow after Church. This is truly a battle for the skirt. He has never had to pursue, court or cherish a woman's feelings. And it is becoming painfully obvious he doesn't know how to. The only way to train a man is lack of contact, according to the Bitch Book. And men fall in love when they are away, says Pat Allen. So I am one hour and sometimes one minute at a time staying away. Ladies, we have the power and we are the prize! Any man who thinks that he is the prize is a feminine man or a narcissist and you can do better.
Until we meet again, lovelies!
Sweet dreams,
Goddess Girl
Monday, August 9, 2010
FACE BOOK FREEZE OUT!
Dear Lovely Ladies,
I have not been blogging much because I have been off cavorting with MOH. We have been having a grand ole romance. I haven't had this much fun since my ex-fiance and that ended in 2008. He is an Adonis in bed. I mean, he rocked my world! He even agreed to the contract before sex. He said he would be monogamous, meaning we would only have sex with each other, duh! He said he would have continuity, which means he would see me at least once a week. And he also, agreed to long term. We had sex like 8 times in a week. He wanted to see me every night and we couldn't get enough of each other. We went to Agape together and he introduced me to all his friends and even told his Mom about me. He called me, Mrs. MOH. He was the life of the party and had blinding charisma. Women wanted him and men wanted to be him. He took me to a heavy metal concert at the Key Club, where we hugged and made out like teenagers. In his words, "Who would have guessed, that at 43, I could ever feel this way again."
But all that came to a grinding halt, due to a Face Book comment I made. I innocently took a picture of a gopher coming out of the ground at yoga class and posted it on Face Book. Some guy, Charlie, made a dumb joke. He said, "he was just saying "gopher it." Get it? Go For It! gopher... go for... *sigh* never mind..."
Then MOH says, "small world...you know Chris...Chris you know Buffy...lol".
And I said, "Who's Buffy?"
MOH says, "you!"
It was kind of weird because he had never called me Buffy before and now he was calling me Buffy to his friend on Face Book. This was some sort of territorial thing but I didn't realize it at the time. Then Charlie says, "MOH is a former classmate of mine, Godess Girl... he's obviously starting the weekend festivities a bit early..."
By the way, does anyone know what means? I have no idea. So I chimed in and left the relationship destroying comment, "OBVIOUSLY". I mean, I was just going along with the joke with no intentions whatsoever to hurt MOH. I mean, why would I? I was having the time of my life with him. Then MOH starts instant messaging me that I was being so "not cool" to say that. So I of course apologized and deleted my comment. MOH goes on and on about how I am disloyal and how I showed my true colors. I asked for forgiveness and he said "no". He went on to call me a "liar" and thought I was private messaging Charlie and that we were in cahoots. I barely met Charlie once at a party and he is my Face Book friend. If you would have told me that Charlie would one day, cock block the best sex of my life, I wouldn't have believed you. If you would have told me the innocent picture I posted of a gopher would have caused me some serious heart ache, I wouldn't have bought it. It just goes to show how one event leads to another which leads to another. You can't predict or plan life.
It is now Monday night and MOH hasn't responded to my texts or calls all weekend. So I just gave up. I assume we are broken up. He is now officially on the 8 week plan. Eight weeks is a scientific number which has to do with how the male brain works. It takes three days for dendrites to form. Thirty days to soft wire and sixty days to hard wire. As much as I want to go to his apartment and beat down his door and demand that we talk it through, if nothing else to defend my integrity, I can't do that. I must remain aloof and distant so that he realizes how much he misses me. I have made my amends and asked for a time to talk and he bitterly refused me. So now is the time to out "fem" him. Remember the three P's, although, nearly impossible to do, they are our greatest weapon. PATIENCE, PASSIVITY AND PERSISTENCE. It can take a while, but all men eventually are defeated by the three P's. Once you feed a dog, he will always come back for a scrap. In fact, every guy I have ever slept with has eventually come back and wanted more. The most challenging part is seeing him on Face Book instant messenger and not im'ing him. I may even de-friend him, but I have to run it by my therapist. I probably won't though. I won't lower myself to his immature, high school behaviour. I will rise above it, and act as if it never happened. Ladies, I hate games and I wish I didn't have to play them, but at this stage, it is the only way I can get my power back. I know I can see him either Friday night at a party in Beverly Hills or at Agape Sunday.When I see him, I will act as if nothing's wrong, and keep it light and polite.
Beauties, I have to believe that when one door closes another one opens. That men are like buses, there's one coming every 10 minutes. I am glad I lost my 2010 virginity and that I had sex under contract. I am glad I had someone to play and practice with. He wasn't rich, he had two room mates and three cats. He was tight with his money and a total mama's boy. It would have never worked out long term and I am glad it only lasted three weeks. He was so cheap, he didn't even leave toilet paper in his bathroom because he didn't want his room mates to use it! Remember ladies, that REJECTION IS GOD'S PROTECTION. He is an acting coach to hoochie mama's and he posts disgusting Maxim style pictures of his students on his Face Book wall. He is not classy and reminds me of working class heroes like Steve Perry of Journey or Kid Rock. He told me every excuse why he couldn't be in a relationship and he latched onto a Face Book comment as his excuse to get out. As they say, "Thanks, for playing, MOH! Next contestant please!"
Until next time, pretty girls, smile like you mean it!
Ciao,
Goddess Girl
I have not been blogging much because I have been off cavorting with MOH. We have been having a grand ole romance. I haven't had this much fun since my ex-fiance and that ended in 2008. He is an Adonis in bed. I mean, he rocked my world! He even agreed to the contract before sex. He said he would be monogamous, meaning we would only have sex with each other, duh! He said he would have continuity, which means he would see me at least once a week. And he also, agreed to long term. We had sex like 8 times in a week. He wanted to see me every night and we couldn't get enough of each other. We went to Agape together and he introduced me to all his friends and even told his Mom about me. He called me, Mrs. MOH. He was the life of the party and had blinding charisma. Women wanted him and men wanted to be him. He took me to a heavy metal concert at the Key Club, where we hugged and made out like teenagers. In his words, "Who would have guessed, that at 43, I could ever feel this way again."
But all that came to a grinding halt, due to a Face Book comment I made. I innocently took a picture of a gopher coming out of the ground at yoga class and posted it on Face Book. Some guy, Charlie, made a dumb joke. He said, "he was just saying "gopher it." Get it? Go For It! gopher... go for... *sigh* never mind...
Then MOH says, "small world...you know Chris...Chris you know Buffy...lol".
And I said, "Who's Buffy?"
MOH says, "you!"
It was kind of weird because he had never called me Buffy before and now he was calling me Buffy to his friend on Face Book. This was some sort of territorial thing but I didn't realize it at the time. Then Charlie says, "MOH is a former classmate of mine, Godess Girl... he's obviously starting the weekend festivities a bit early..
By the way, does anyone know what
It is now Monday night and MOH hasn't responded to my texts or calls all weekend. So I just gave up. I assume we are broken up. He is now officially on the 8 week plan. Eight weeks is a scientific number which has to do with how the male brain works. It takes three days for dendrites to form. Thirty days to soft wire and sixty days to hard wire. As much as I want to go to his apartment and beat down his door and demand that we talk it through, if nothing else to defend my integrity, I can't do that. I must remain aloof and distant so that he realizes how much he misses me. I have made my amends and asked for a time to talk and he bitterly refused me. So now is the time to out "fem" him. Remember the three P's, although, nearly impossible to do, they are our greatest weapon. PATIENCE, PASSIVITY AND PERSISTENCE. It can take a while, but all men eventually are defeated by the three P's. Once you feed a dog, he will always come back for a scrap. In fact, every guy I have ever slept with has eventually come back and wanted more. The most challenging part is seeing him on Face Book instant messenger and not im'ing him. I may even de-friend him, but I have to run it by my therapist. I probably won't though. I won't lower myself to his immature, high school behaviour. I will rise above it, and act as if it never happened. Ladies, I hate games and I wish I didn't have to play them, but at this stage, it is the only way I can get my power back. I know I can see him either Friday night at a party in Beverly Hills or at Agape Sunday.When I see him, I will act as if nothing's wrong, and keep it light and polite.
Beauties, I have to believe that when one door closes another one opens. That men are like buses, there's one coming every 10 minutes. I am glad I lost my 2010 virginity and that I had sex under contract. I am glad I had someone to play and practice with. He wasn't rich, he had two room mates and three cats. He was tight with his money and a total mama's boy. It would have never worked out long term and I am glad it only lasted three weeks. He was so cheap, he didn't even leave toilet paper in his bathroom because he didn't want his room mates to use it! Remember ladies, that REJECTION IS GOD'S PROTECTION. He is an acting coach to hoochie mama's and he posts disgusting Maxim style pictures of his students on his Face Book wall. He is not classy and reminds me of working class heroes like Steve Perry of Journey or Kid Rock. He told me every excuse why he couldn't be in a relationship and he latched onto a Face Book comment as his excuse to get out. As they say, "Thanks, for playing, MOH! Next contestant please!"
Until next time, pretty girls, smile like you mean it!
Ciao,
Goddess Girl
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
THE MAYOR OF HOLLYWOOD
Hey Gorgeous Gals,
Sorry I have been MIA for a couple weeks. I have been playing with the Mayor of Hollywood. Let's call him MOH for short. I had initially met him over St. Patrick's Day weekend. I attended a charity fund raiser for animals and brought my dog as a date. It was a cold and rainy night in March. The event was sparsely attended, but I was excited to have my number one guy with me on a Saturday night, my dog, and I put him in a green wife beater tee. I remember watching MOH circle around me and make lots of eye contact. Finally, he got my number and said he was a producer. When he asked me what I was doing later that night, I said going to an art gallery opening. I didn't hear from him, other than a friend request on face book the next day.
A couple months later, I saw him at an event with Pam Anderson in Hollywood. She was endorsing a new milkshake shop. I was with my brother and MOH was very nice to my brother. He asked me about my acting and said he wanted to shoot a demo reel for me and that was about it. That was in April. Then, in May, I saw him when I was leaving Agape in Culver City. I was with my friend and we were on a spiritual high after a three day silent meditation retreat with Michael Beckwith. He was walking in as I was walking out. And most recently, I was at an Entertainment networking event in West Hollywood at the Sofitel. I was with a new friend, who had to leave unexpectedly early. Of course, I decided to stay.
I was delighted to see a familiar face and I approached MOH's table and proclaimed, "Well, if it isn't the Mayor of Hollywood!"
And to that he responded, "Well, if it isn't Mrs. MOH!"
For the remainder of the evening, he introduced me as his future wife and his fiance. He was an electric evening fraught with so much sexual tension. When we finally left the party and found a quiet corner of the hotel, he sat me on his lap and he kissed me. It was an amazingly intense kiss. I haven't had a kiss like that since 2007. It was a magical evening. He walked me to my car and pushed me against a wall, and kissed me with even more passion. I really never thought I would be kissed that way again, girls. I thought I would have to settle for some schlub. Girls, don't settle. I am so glad I met him organically and not through the Internet. There's something about the Internet that just sterilizes the chemistry. When a man and woman meet and spontaneously just have to kiss, it's called romance and it's just so raw, and the itnernte is so contrived.
So I took him home and we kissed again in the car. He looked at me with his beautiful blue eyes and said, "I know you are the One. I knew it from the moment I saw you on the green carpet."
And then, he cried. No, seriously, I couldn't make this up! So I drop him off and then he emails me, "I miss you Mrs. MOH!"
That Sunday, I visited him on the set of an independent film he was producing. I had to watch him be all over some 20something chick in an S n M outfit. Only in Hollyweird, right? So, I stay for as long as I can bear and then he walks me to my car and kisses me again. He said the famous lines that so many men have said so many times and not followed through on, "I'll call you."
Of course, I didn't hear from him at all that week. So he went from calling me his fiance and crying because he had finally found the One, to not calling. Yes, ladies when a guy really likes us, they go out of their way to play it cool. The stakes are higher and they don't want to risk getting hurt. When they do that, the biggest challenge is to not take it personally and to not go over every phrase you said to figure out what you could have possibly said to turn him off. That is a waste of your precious time, ladies. The bottom line is that they are scared shitless because they are powerless over us and we have the POP, power of the pussy. I saw him the following weekend with my BFF in tow. The sparks were still flying and I hope you will tune in to hear what happened next! Until then...
Be of Good Cheer!
Love,
Goddess Girl
Sorry I have been MIA for a couple weeks. I have been playing with the Mayor of Hollywood. Let's call him MOH for short. I had initially met him over St. Patrick's Day weekend. I attended a charity fund raiser for animals and brought my dog as a date. It was a cold and rainy night in March. The event was sparsely attended, but I was excited to have my number one guy with me on a Saturday night, my dog, and I put him in a green wife beater tee. I remember watching MOH circle around me and make lots of eye contact. Finally, he got my number and said he was a producer. When he asked me what I was doing later that night, I said going to an art gallery opening. I didn't hear from him, other than a friend request on face book the next day.
A couple months later, I saw him at an event with Pam Anderson in Hollywood. She was endorsing a new milkshake shop. I was with my brother and MOH was very nice to my brother. He asked me about my acting and said he wanted to shoot a demo reel for me and that was about it. That was in April. Then, in May, I saw him when I was leaving Agape in Culver City. I was with my friend and we were on a spiritual high after a three day silent meditation retreat with Michael Beckwith. He was walking in as I was walking out. And most recently, I was at an Entertainment networking event in West Hollywood at the Sofitel. I was with a new friend, who had to leave unexpectedly early. Of course, I decided to stay.
I was delighted to see a familiar face and I approached MOH's table and proclaimed, "Well, if it isn't the Mayor of Hollywood!"
And to that he responded, "Well, if it isn't Mrs. MOH!"
For the remainder of the evening, he introduced me as his future wife and his fiance. He was an electric evening fraught with so much sexual tension. When we finally left the party and found a quiet corner of the hotel, he sat me on his lap and he kissed me. It was an amazingly intense kiss. I haven't had a kiss like that since 2007. It was a magical evening. He walked me to my car and pushed me against a wall, and kissed me with even more passion. I really never thought I would be kissed that way again, girls. I thought I would have to settle for some schlub. Girls, don't settle. I am so glad I met him organically and not through the Internet. There's something about the Internet that just sterilizes the chemistry. When a man and woman meet and spontaneously just have to kiss, it's called romance and it's just so raw, and the itnernte is so contrived.
So I took him home and we kissed again in the car. He looked at me with his beautiful blue eyes and said, "I know you are the One. I knew it from the moment I saw you on the green carpet."
And then, he cried. No, seriously, I couldn't make this up! So I drop him off and then he emails me, "I miss you Mrs. MOH!"
That Sunday, I visited him on the set of an independent film he was producing. I had to watch him be all over some 20something chick in an S n M outfit. Only in Hollyweird, right? So, I stay for as long as I can bear and then he walks me to my car and kisses me again. He said the famous lines that so many men have said so many times and not followed through on, "I'll call you."
Of course, I didn't hear from him at all that week. So he went from calling me his fiance and crying because he had finally found the One, to not calling. Yes, ladies when a guy really likes us, they go out of their way to play it cool. The stakes are higher and they don't want to risk getting hurt. When they do that, the biggest challenge is to not take it personally and to not go over every phrase you said to figure out what you could have possibly said to turn him off. That is a waste of your precious time, ladies. The bottom line is that they are scared shitless because they are powerless over us and we have the POP, power of the pussy. I saw him the following weekend with my BFF in tow. The sparks were still flying and I hope you will tune in to hear what happened next! Until then...
Be of Good Cheer!
Love,
Goddess Girl
Sunday, July 11, 2010
CON ARTIST AT LARGE
Hiya Gals,
Sorry I have been so neglectful, but I have been out there dating and partying like a motha fucka. So much to tell you, but let's start with last night, one of the craziest nights I have had in Hollywood. So, I go to this fancy hotel on the beach in Santa Monica, Casa del Mar. I was invited to a birthday party, where I knew no one and everyone knew each other. So needless to say, I was bored out of my mind. I was also hungry, I noticed two of the girls from the party were sitting down at a table with an attractive guy. I joined them in hopes of ordering appetizers. I quickly found out the the man at the table, Shawn, was a series regular on 'All My Children' and was in town to shoot a movie with Matt Damon and Robert Downey, Jr. Another guy sat down next to me and started talking because his buddies bet him $20 that he didn't have the nerve to talk to me. When he left, I got my cards out to give one of the girls at the table. Then, Shawn says, "I will take your card."
I was actually really surprised because he was flirting with the other girl and I hadn't given him any attention. So I sit down again and I say, "I really want to ask you for a huge favor, but I am embarrassed."
He says, "Fire away! Ask me anything!"
So I say, "I have a crazy, mad crush on Matt Damon. Can you introduce me to him?"
He was like,"How do I know you aren't a stalker? You better not act weird or he will be so mad at me! Please don't throw yourself at him."
After, I assured him that I wasn't going to make a fool of myself or try to bust up his marriage, he agreed to introduce me. I got so happy and excited when he told me the Irish pub they frequent and that he would definitely introduce me, if I promised to be cool. Then, he pulled a total "Entourage" move and said, "What if I told you I could get Matt Damon to come to your condo tonight? Would you leave with me?" Now, girls, I never, ever advise leaving a bar with a stranger but this guy seemed harmless to me. And, I am the eternal optimist and really thought Matt Damon might just possibly come over so I left the bar with this guy. As soon as we get outside, we start making out passionately. By the time we get to me car, a block away, he has proposed marriage and told me he loved me!! He was like, "Let's go to Vegas tonight! You are the one I have been dreaming about. You are everything I want and more. I am never going back home to my girlfriend and her two kids. Let's just do it!"
I was like, "I have to go home and deal with my dog. But we can go to the Justice of the Peace in LA tomorrow." And he agreed that was a great idea. So all the sudden, I try to start the car, only to realize that I left my Chloe coat in the hotel with my car and house keys in the pocket. So I go to the hotel and get my coat. He is at the front desk, telling me how cool my coat is. We are walking back to the car. We are about 50 feet from the hotel and the waitress runs out to get us. She says, "You know you never paid your tab."
He says, "I told my people to take care of it."
She says, "Well, they never paid for you." So we walk back into the hotel, yet again. I sit down in the lobby to wait for him to handle his bill with the waitress. After 20 minutes, I go up to the waitress and ask her if she has seen him. She says, "No. You got conned. He is not with a production company. He disappeared." I was shocked. He seemed so sincere and so connected to Matt Damon. I then called the number he gave me and it was disconnected. I went back to my car and pulled to the front of the hotel. I was so surprised by his disappearance that I just had to check the lobby one more time to make sure he hadn't come back. And sure enough he was nowhere to be seen.
Ladies, the moral of this story is don't ever leave a bar with a stranger, even if they promise to introduce you to Matt Damon. Rejection is definitely God's protection. Thank Gawd, I left my jacket in the hotel. I probably would have had casual sex or something way worse could have happened. I looked him up today on IMDB and couldn't find anything. He is the best con artist ever! He seemed so sincere about his friendship with Matt and his wife Luciana. I knew the "I will marry you tonight" bull shit was to get laid. I mean, I am naive but not that naive. So I emailed Matt Damon through Face Book and told him what happened. I doubt he will ever read it or email me back, but it's worth a shot. When you got nothing, you got nothing to lose.
Most women would be mad at Shawn and frustrated by the whole situation. But not me! I just think it was hilarious. I got to practice being authentic and asking for what I wanted. I got to practice negotiating my deal breakers in a marriage. I got a marriage proposal, declarations of love and hella compliments by a gorgeous guy in his 30s who is a fantastic kisser. Prior to this weekend, I have had very little chemistry and no excitement. And I had an excuse to email Matt Damon! Remember what I always say, girls, just enjoy the journey. Take it one date at a time. I am sure I will never hear from that guy again, but he flattered and entertained the hell out of me. It sure beat staying home or going out on another pathetic Internet date. I just show up and I let God decide who he will put onto or take off my path. The timing of the Universe is way better than mine. We make plans and God laughs! Be well, beauties!
Hugs and kisses,
Goddess Girl
Sorry I have been so neglectful, but I have been out there dating and partying like a motha fucka. So much to tell you, but let's start with last night, one of the craziest nights I have had in Hollywood. So, I go to this fancy hotel on the beach in Santa Monica, Casa del Mar. I was invited to a birthday party, where I knew no one and everyone knew each other. So needless to say, I was bored out of my mind. I was also hungry, I noticed two of the girls from the party were sitting down at a table with an attractive guy. I joined them in hopes of ordering appetizers. I quickly found out the the man at the table, Shawn, was a series regular on 'All My Children' and was in town to shoot a movie with Matt Damon and Robert Downey, Jr. Another guy sat down next to me and started talking because his buddies bet him $20 that he didn't have the nerve to talk to me. When he left, I got my cards out to give one of the girls at the table. Then, Shawn says, "I will take your card."
I was actually really surprised because he was flirting with the other girl and I hadn't given him any attention. So I sit down again and I say, "I really want to ask you for a huge favor, but I am embarrassed."
He says, "Fire away! Ask me anything!"
So I say, "I have a crazy, mad crush on Matt Damon. Can you introduce me to him?"
He was like,"How do I know you aren't a stalker? You better not act weird or he will be so mad at me! Please don't throw yourself at him."
After, I assured him that I wasn't going to make a fool of myself or try to bust up his marriage, he agreed to introduce me. I got so happy and excited when he told me the Irish pub they frequent and that he would definitely introduce me, if I promised to be cool. Then, he pulled a total "Entourage" move and said, "What if I told you I could get Matt Damon to come to your condo tonight? Would you leave with me?" Now, girls, I never, ever advise leaving a bar with a stranger but this guy seemed harmless to me. And, I am the eternal optimist and really thought Matt Damon might just possibly come over so I left the bar with this guy. As soon as we get outside, we start making out passionately. By the time we get to me car, a block away, he has proposed marriage and told me he loved me!! He was like, "Let's go to Vegas tonight! You are the one I have been dreaming about. You are everything I want and more. I am never going back home to my girlfriend and her two kids. Let's just do it!"
I was like, "I have to go home and deal with my dog. But we can go to the Justice of the Peace in LA tomorrow." And he agreed that was a great idea. So all the sudden, I try to start the car, only to realize that I left my Chloe coat in the hotel with my car and house keys in the pocket. So I go to the hotel and get my coat. He is at the front desk, telling me how cool my coat is. We are walking back to the car. We are about 50 feet from the hotel and the waitress runs out to get us. She says, "You know you never paid your tab."
He says, "I told my people to take care of it."
She says, "Well, they never paid for you." So we walk back into the hotel, yet again. I sit down in the lobby to wait for him to handle his bill with the waitress. After 20 minutes, I go up to the waitress and ask her if she has seen him. She says, "No. You got conned. He is not with a production company. He disappeared." I was shocked. He seemed so sincere and so connected to Matt Damon. I then called the number he gave me and it was disconnected. I went back to my car and pulled to the front of the hotel. I was so surprised by his disappearance that I just had to check the lobby one more time to make sure he hadn't come back. And sure enough he was nowhere to be seen.
Ladies, the moral of this story is don't ever leave a bar with a stranger, even if they promise to introduce you to Matt Damon. Rejection is definitely God's protection. Thank Gawd, I left my jacket in the hotel. I probably would have had casual sex or something way worse could have happened. I looked him up today on IMDB and couldn't find anything. He is the best con artist ever! He seemed so sincere about his friendship with Matt and his wife Luciana. I knew the "I will marry you tonight" bull shit was to get laid. I mean, I am naive but not that naive. So I emailed Matt Damon through Face Book and told him what happened. I doubt he will ever read it or email me back, but it's worth a shot. When you got nothing, you got nothing to lose.
Most women would be mad at Shawn and frustrated by the whole situation. But not me! I just think it was hilarious. I got to practice being authentic and asking for what I wanted. I got to practice negotiating my deal breakers in a marriage. I got a marriage proposal, declarations of love and hella compliments by a gorgeous guy in his 30s who is a fantastic kisser. Prior to this weekend, I have had very little chemistry and no excitement. And I had an excuse to email Matt Damon! Remember what I always say, girls, just enjoy the journey. Take it one date at a time. I am sure I will never hear from that guy again, but he flattered and entertained the hell out of me. It sure beat staying home or going out on another pathetic Internet date. I just show up and I let God decide who he will put onto or take off my path. The timing of the Universe is way better than mine. We make plans and God laughs! Be well, beauties!
Hugs and kisses,
Goddess Girl
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
NEW PORCH PASSES ISSUED
Hello beauties,
So there are some new contenders on the porch. Remember, a 'contender' is a potential long term partner. As opposed to a 'booty call', which is a one night stand or 'servicing agreement', a regular sex partner, who is not monogamous. The first contender is named Paul. Paul is not my typical guy. I am a nonconformist rebel and he works for corp America and holds a government office. I mean when he picked me up Saturday night in a Crown Victoria, I was appalled. I have learned to keep my mouth shut and not put down a guy's car. So after I get in the car, he says, "I drive this car because I work part time for LA County."
I was like, "Is this a cop car?"
He says, "It can be." He pulls down the passenger visor and cop lights turn on. The car also had a walkie talkie. He took me to a nice restaurant in Santa Monica that I had never been to called Anisette. It was very charming and he suggested I order my own appetizer. Ding, ding, ding...Bonus points. We may have a Provider/Protector in the house. Our conversation was deep and intellectual. I haven't had that for a long time and it was nice. He was humble and asking me questions about myself. He insisted we get two desserts. More bonus points! He even stood up, when I got up to go to the bathroom. That was old school and very charming!
After dinner, I wasn't ready to go home so I consulted the Urban Daddy app on my IPhone. They should have an Urban Momma app! The Urban Daddy said we should go to Urth Cafe in Beverly Hills. But I suggested we go to the Shangri La hotel right around the corner. We got a table and had no service for 20 minutes. When we finally got our beverages, our waitress felt so badly for making us wait so long, that she said the drinks were on the house. Nice! There was more heartfelt and meaningful conversation about the economy, politics and family.
When he took me home, he asked if I wanted company walking my dog and I said, "yes". Pat Allen says to say 'Yes, Please and Thank you' to men unless what they are offering is immoral, illegal or unethical. We had a lovely walk and I can tell he was tickled by my dog's joie de vivre. He also was charmed by how emotionally entangled I was with my dog. My dog certainly liked him, which is always a good sign. At the end of the night, he leaned in to kiss me and I just allowed a peck on the lips. Thank Gawd he didn't try to stick his tongue in my mouth. He sent me a "thank you" text the next day, which is so appreciated. I responded back, of course, that was Sunday. Today is Wednesday and he texted me today, but didn't ask me out. If he was waiting for me to ask him out, he will have to wait until hell freezes over.
He is preppy, smart, classy and funny. I am not sure he is sexy or man enough for me though. I am a "rage against the machine" type of gal, so that fact that he is so mainstream is a bit of a turn off. But I am going to remain open minded. I would love to have him as a friend, but sometimes men are too hurt to do that if I reject him romantically. I would definitely go out with him a few more times. How important is someone's world view? Can someone still be a nonconformist if they work for corporate America or the government? I do want to be inspired by what my husband does, but maybe there is something else about him, that I don't know yet that will inspire me. I will wait and keep you girls posted.
Tomorrow I am going out with another new guy on the porch. It is our second date. Our first date was a walk around the Penmar golf course. More on him later...
Have a blissful night,
Goddess Girl
So there are some new contenders on the porch. Remember, a 'contender' is a potential long term partner. As opposed to a 'booty call', which is a one night stand or 'servicing agreement', a regular sex partner, who is not monogamous. The first contender is named Paul. Paul is not my typical guy. I am a nonconformist rebel and he works for corp America and holds a government office. I mean when he picked me up Saturday night in a Crown Victoria, I was appalled. I have learned to keep my mouth shut and not put down a guy's car. So after I get in the car, he says, "I drive this car because I work part time for LA County."
I was like, "Is this a cop car?"
He says, "It can be." He pulls down the passenger visor and cop lights turn on. The car also had a walkie talkie. He took me to a nice restaurant in Santa Monica that I had never been to called Anisette. It was very charming and he suggested I order my own appetizer. Ding, ding, ding...Bonus points. We may have a Provider/Protector in the house. Our conversation was deep and intellectual. I haven't had that for a long time and it was nice. He was humble and asking me questions about myself. He insisted we get two desserts. More bonus points! He even stood up, when I got up to go to the bathroom. That was old school and very charming!
After dinner, I wasn't ready to go home so I consulted the Urban Daddy app on my IPhone. They should have an Urban Momma app! The Urban Daddy said we should go to Urth Cafe in Beverly Hills. But I suggested we go to the Shangri La hotel right around the corner. We got a table and had no service for 20 minutes. When we finally got our beverages, our waitress felt so badly for making us wait so long, that she said the drinks were on the house. Nice! There was more heartfelt and meaningful conversation about the economy, politics and family.
When he took me home, he asked if I wanted company walking my dog and I said, "yes". Pat Allen says to say 'Yes, Please and Thank you' to men unless what they are offering is immoral, illegal or unethical. We had a lovely walk and I can tell he was tickled by my dog's joie de vivre. He also was charmed by how emotionally entangled I was with my dog. My dog certainly liked him, which is always a good sign. At the end of the night, he leaned in to kiss me and I just allowed a peck on the lips. Thank Gawd he didn't try to stick his tongue in my mouth. He sent me a "thank you" text the next day, which is so appreciated. I responded back, of course, that was Sunday. Today is Wednesday and he texted me today, but didn't ask me out. If he was waiting for me to ask him out, he will have to wait until hell freezes over.
He is preppy, smart, classy and funny. I am not sure he is sexy or man enough for me though. I am a "rage against the machine" type of gal, so that fact that he is so mainstream is a bit of a turn off. But I am going to remain open minded. I would love to have him as a friend, but sometimes men are too hurt to do that if I reject him romantically. I would definitely go out with him a few more times. How important is someone's world view? Can someone still be a nonconformist if they work for corporate America or the government? I do want to be inspired by what my husband does, but maybe there is something else about him, that I don't know yet that will inspire me. I will wait and keep you girls posted.
Tomorrow I am going out with another new guy on the porch. It is our second date. Our first date was a walk around the Penmar golf course. More on him later...
Have a blissful night,
Goddess Girl
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
OH NOOO, HE DIDN'T!
My Girls,
I am so sorry it has taken me so long to write you. After the last date, where the tycoon got that chick's phone number I took a two week hiatus from dating. I was listening to a Wayne Dyer CD and he said in no uncertain terms, "Stop searching for love! Let love find you!" I agree with Wayne D, because searching for love is just exhausting. So what has happened in the last couple weeks since we have last chatted, let me tell you, girlfriend, A LOT. This ain't no disco here in LA.
So I went to lunch with my brother and a group of attorneys and when I met them at Houston's in Santa Monica, one of the lawyers greeted me very lasciviously. I have no problem with being lusted after, no problem at all. But then this man, we will call him LL for lawyer loser, went on to ask me the worst series of questions that a man could ask a woman. You will be flabbergasted. The following questions were really asked of me..
1. How old are you? (Par for the course of rude questions) Ladies, you don't have any obligation to tell a man your age. Just tell him, "I am old enough to know better and young enough to not be able to resist."
2. What size bra do you wear? He guessed 34 b and I was insulted enough to give him my real size 36 c. And get this, he challenged me on it! Like I would lie about such a thing. I was defending my cup size within the first five minutes of meeting LL.
3. What are your measurements? He guessed way smaller than I am so I said, "yes, exactly." If they guess low on my age or weight, I usually just say,"exactly", lol.
4. He asked me three adjectives to describe him. Not such a bad question. I wish I had said, "Rude, crass, and tactless."
5. How many lovers have you had? I shouldn't have even answered this one, but I lied and said, "I could count them on one hand."
6. When was the last time I had sex? I was stupid and told the truth and told him, "Let's just say I am a 2010 virgin." This is sad, but true. But it's only June the year's not over yet.
7. And for his grand finale, he asked me if I thought that guys with small hands had a small penis. I said, "yes". So to prove me wrong, he busted out his cell phone and asked, "Would you like to see a photo of my penis? It's very big!" I was like, "Absolutely, not! I am so uncomfortable with that!"
He then got my number, paid for my lunch and invited me to go to Burke Williams for a spa day with the other female lawyers. I thanked him, but told him I had to get to therapy. I spent the first 15 minutes of therapy lamenting that I even answered any of his questions at all. Girls, you don't have to answer a question, just because a guy asks you. You can say, "I am not comfortable discussing that." Or you can say, "that is just too personal, I don't want to talk about it." I am not going to beat myself up for answering so many of his questions because I strive for imperfection. I am perfectly imperfect! You live and you learn, y'know?
So that was my random lunch with the lawyers. I have some new guys on my porch who I will discuss in the next blog, so stay tuned.
Signing out,
Goddess Girl
I am so sorry it has taken me so long to write you. After the last date, where the tycoon got that chick's phone number I took a two week hiatus from dating. I was listening to a Wayne Dyer CD and he said in no uncertain terms, "Stop searching for love! Let love find you!" I agree with Wayne D, because searching for love is just exhausting. So what has happened in the last couple weeks since we have last chatted, let me tell you, girlfriend, A LOT. This ain't no disco here in LA.
So I went to lunch with my brother and a group of attorneys and when I met them at Houston's in Santa Monica, one of the lawyers greeted me very lasciviously. I have no problem with being lusted after, no problem at all. But then this man, we will call him LL for lawyer loser, went on to ask me the worst series of questions that a man could ask a woman. You will be flabbergasted. The following questions were really asked of me..
1. How old are you? (Par for the course of rude questions) Ladies, you don't have any obligation to tell a man your age. Just tell him, "I am old enough to know better and young enough to not be able to resist."
2. What size bra do you wear? He guessed 34 b and I was insulted enough to give him my real size 36 c. And get this, he challenged me on it! Like I would lie about such a thing. I was defending my cup size within the first five minutes of meeting LL.
3. What are your measurements? He guessed way smaller than I am so I said, "yes, exactly." If they guess low on my age or weight, I usually just say,"exactly", lol.
4. He asked me three adjectives to describe him. Not such a bad question. I wish I had said, "Rude, crass, and tactless."
5. How many lovers have you had? I shouldn't have even answered this one, but I lied and said, "I could count them on one hand."
6. When was the last time I had sex? I was stupid and told the truth and told him, "Let's just say I am a 2010 virgin." This is sad, but true. But it's only June the year's not over yet.
7. And for his grand finale, he asked me if I thought that guys with small hands had a small penis. I said, "yes". So to prove me wrong, he busted out his cell phone and asked, "Would you like to see a photo of my penis? It's very big!" I was like, "Absolutely, not! I am so uncomfortable with that!"
He then got my number, paid for my lunch and invited me to go to Burke Williams for a spa day with the other female lawyers. I thanked him, but told him I had to get to therapy. I spent the first 15 minutes of therapy lamenting that I even answered any of his questions at all. Girls, you don't have to answer a question, just because a guy asks you. You can say, "I am not comfortable discussing that." Or you can say, "that is just too personal, I don't want to talk about it." I am not going to beat myself up for answering so many of his questions because I strive for imperfection. I am perfectly imperfect! You live and you learn, y'know?
So that was my random lunch with the lawyers. I have some new guys on my porch who I will discuss in the next blog, so stay tuned.
Signing out,
Goddess Girl
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